This is my second time watching Neon Genesis Evangelion series, my favorite Japanese visual pop culture −yes, it is anime− all the time. I think it was about a boy named Shinji Ikari who saved the earth by riding a big robot, but I am wrong. It is all about the characters who try to find their role and questioning their life meaning. Each of dialogues and scenes gives me a great night to be wasted. My Neon Genesis Evangelion re-watching turns to be “what I’ve done with my life” section.
Some of you who have been on 20s certainly have this kind of question in their mind. “What do I want to be?”; “What is the purpose of my life?”; “Is this the way of life that I want?”; “How to live my life?” are some of examples questions from a million of thoughts which make us still awake at 3 A.M. Those questions or thoughts are like a double-edge knife, either you wake up then feel motivated to start your day or feel done with your entire life and back to your comfort bed. So, don’t be surprised if you find that your friend is full of spirit or the opposite in the next day.
Rene Descartes, a French-born existentialist philosopher, states in his Discourse on the Method (1637) “Cogito, ergo sum”, usually translated as “I think, therefore I am”. Our mind is like a fuel for the car. We can buy a food because we can earn money. We can earn money because we are working. We can work because our mind wants to buy food so we do not die of starving. It is okay if you are such an over-thinker person. It means that you are on the right way, you are really alive, like a lot. The way we questioning our life is a thing that show us that we are alive. Without thoughts, we are just a bunch of walking flesh.
We know what we want and how to achieve it. One thing that we need to keep in our mind is we are created without purpose. Well, if it is according to Genesis 1: 28 “Be fruitful and increase in number; fill the earth and subdue it. Rule over the fish in the sea and the birds in the sky and over every living creature that moves on the ground”. In simple way, we are created to rule the world, then why aren’t all of us just being Donald Trump or Gajah Mada and have a lot babies so this earth is full of baby diapers. The purpose of our life is not set by our creator. If you have seen new Disney’s movie, Soul, you must be know about this. The “spark” which make a soul deserve to go to earth is not because they know what they will be become or their purpose of life. The purpose of your life is decided by yourself, you can try many things in this world so you can make a certain goal for your life depends on your strengths and weakness. It could change as the days goes by and as we grow. Maybe when we was on elementary school, we want to be a pilot, doctor, or police, but now we just want to enjoy our life. That is the process to find our purpose of life.
Sometime, the thoughts above make us feel down and clueless about our life and then we drown ourselves in self-hatred abyss. Moreover, we draw a conclusion that our life is such a failure and meaningless. It is really make-sense, but I don’t want make you to feel comfort. From those feelings, we should drive it to be less harmful for us. Take a bigger view of your life and see what you can do for your life. The process to find the purpose of life is different from one person to other. Yet, it is not your time. Soon or later, it will be your time.
